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Featherless wings

This post is about the first “poem” I wrote. It’s about my family, and what we hoped for our new life in our new home, 700 kilometers away from my birth town. But everything went wrong since then…
It goes like this:

We were hoping for good lives
In this new location
A place where we could abandon the knives
Erase all the frustration
Perhaps a sort of salvation
From the depths we fell into
Desperate to find a solution
And a safe world to return back to

Was it too early or were we too greedy?
Any which way we take it’s always a living hell

I don’t count the fights, I’d fill the notebook
So many enemies, so little friends
Even we doubt the family

We were taught to act like that
Protecting ourselves by hurting another
Never let anyone enter
In these dark places we call our hearts

Was it too early? Or were we too greedy?
Any which way we take it’s always a living hell

Now in this place we had our hopes
But it’s still the same
We cannot even give it the name
Of our very own home

I put myself in state of wait
I push the blankets over my head
Maybe if I think hard
i could sleep until it ends

Wings are hard to break
They’re made of dreams and faith
But I feel my feathers silently falling
One by one, wings become bones
When the last is dead and gone

One by one, faith wings become only bones
When the last feather is dead and gone
And any which way we take, it’s still a living hell

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